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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27893956">letters unsent, burdens unshared</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/moonburntmemory/pseuds/moonburntmemory'>moonburntmemory</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>ZKDrabbleDecember2020 [5]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Avatar: The Last Airbender</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Idiots in Love, Letters, Mental Anguish, Mutual Pining, Post-War, Stream of Consciousness, Unrequited Love, but not actually, everyone goes home happy, zuko being miserable until the last 3 seconds, zuko has resting bitch face</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 16:48:51</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>5,567</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27893956</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/moonburntmemory/pseuds/moonburntmemory</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Zuko and Katara are alone together, connected only through letters. </p><p>They fall to pieces until they figure out how to put each other back together.</p><p>Day 5: Little Pieces<br/>Day 6: Are You Lonely?<br/>Day 11: Falling With You<br/>Day 21: Tired of These Walls</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Katara/Zuko (Avatar)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>ZKDrabbleDecember2020 [5]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2037616</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>60</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>ZK Drabble December 2020</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. broken and mended pieces</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Day 5: Little Pieces of ZK Drabble December 2020</p><p>After the war, Zuko lost pieces of himself over Katara until only a broken shell remained.</p><p>Then lightning strikes and he is whole, once again.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The first part of him chipped away not long after Sozin’s comet soared through the sky and left its bleeding wake.</p><p>Zuko watched this integral part of who he was fall to the ground not dissimilar to the way decades-old, faded paint peels off of water-soaked wood. It didn’t hurt, but the flighty emptiness he felt while observing himself fall apart behind a carefully crafted facade was strange as it enveloped him.</p><p>It struck Zuko as odd that the false shield he armed himself with was made of stone, but the fragility it protected was constructed of glass. Why not just forge him out of impenetrable substance to begin with? What was the point of allowing him to suffer behind barriers no one could see into?</p><p>Sokka had been drawing to the best of his abilities, which was admittedly not much. Gathered amongst friends that had transcended the confines of blood and become his family, Zuko had known contentment. </p><p>It hadn’t lasted long.</p><p>If the events of his past were any indication, he shouldn’t have been surprised. His mouth shouldn’t have fallen open in horror. His eyes shouldn’t have welled with the evidence of his anguish. His hands shouldn’t have clenched into fists that sent every spare ounce of blood in his body burning scarlet in what remained unscarred of his face. </p><p>His mother, his sister, and now her. He was a slow-acting plague that consumed the women in his life until they were gone, one way or another. They’d disappear under mysterious circumstances or have their minds burned and broken. She didn’t have to be like them. She could escape unbearable tragedy by steering clear of him. That was probably her reasoning. Zuko assured himself this was for the best.</p><p>Katara pulled away from Aang’s lips and Zuko looked away.</p><p>The first piece had fallen, but he’d still been mostly intact. Mai may have lacked the fiery passion necessary to melt the shard back into the crack in his innermost glass form, but it was okay. Zuko simply continued on and let the lost parts of himself accumulate on the ground. </p><p>The complacency dislodged more and more of himself as time passed, until the shards of who he had once been littered the ground around him, cutting thin red strokes into his palms every time he tried to pick up the little pieces. </p><p> </p><p>One of the things he could take pride in despite his inner workings falling apart was the fortress that protected it from the outside world. Katara managed to crack that as well. </p><p>It was a dignitary dinner in the former Fire Nation colonies. The years had hollowed out the roundness in her face instead of her heart and had given her a graceful, aged appearance. A face that managed to send more of himself falling to the carpeted floor like fire lily petals past their prime.</p><p>Zuko usually kept his distance from painful reminders of the past, but her uncomfortable shifting in the unmoving wood of her chair made him uneasy. She was out of her element as Aang mindlessly chattered with different politicians as if she was a decorative painting instead of a real person. </p><p>“So, how’s it going?” he addressed with what felt like the first breath on the surface after an eternity submerged underwater.</p><p>Katara smiled sheepishly at him from across the table and shrugged, her lithely muscled shoulders shifting beneath her robes. “Well, you know. Busy. Aang’s getting pulled every which way and I follow.”</p><p>“Ha. I can relate to that. Who’s brilliant idea was it to let us become prominent world leaders, huh?” Zuko attempted to settle her uneasiness, but she slunk further in her chair. </p><p>Katara glanced around the room as he continued to stew in his awkwardness like an overcooked potato in a salty stew. “Yeah, we’re all very important leaders with very important jobs. Every single one of us,” she sighed.</p><p>That was when Zuko saw what Katara was looking at. Him, decked out in Fire Lord regalia signifying importance, Aang diplomatically “engaging” with everyone around him, Toph surrounded by her lackeys/metalbending students, Sokka hunched over some printed schematics with his fellow tribesmen, and Suki standing proud amongst the Kyoshi Warriors she led.</p><p>All were individuals entranced by their own accomplishments and endeavors. Except for Katara. She hung off of Aang’s arm like a cat you hadn’t wanted but accepted under a lease agreement where it came with the house. Katara was an extension of someone else and it had broken her, too.</p><p>That was when Zuko lost the largest piece that dug into the soles of his feet with every step he took. </p><p> </p><p>The next comparable breaking of his soul was the arrival of the thin envelope from Katara, different from the ones she'd sent before. She’d broken up with Aang and was retreating to the South Pole, in very few words. Even without the greatest obstacle between them, she and Zuko still wouldn’t be together. Who would voluntarily step through the minefield of bloody, broken glass surrounding him?</p><p>He stayed away and gave her the space she needed as long as he could manage. Until official business brought him to the icy, frigid homeland that had cultivated such a warm, loving girl.</p><p>The letters they had been exchanging weighed heavily in the bottom of his luggage, but he couldn’t bring himself to read them with Katara so close. </p><p>They remained cordial and professional until the last night of his stay. He was about to surrender to the whim of his dreams ruled by her smile and laughter when a soft knock was tapped on his door. </p><p>Crawling out of his furs and wrapping one over his bare chest, Zuko rose to answer the door and was met by a nervous Katara biting her lip. </p><p>“Here. I figured we could save some money on postage. But don’t open it until you leave,” Katara breathed out, handing him a creme-colored envelope with mittened hands. The jagged edges dug deeper into any available skin they could find.</p><p>“Uh, thank you? Do you want to, uh, come in?” Zuko offered as she continued to stand in the doorway, trying very hard not to gaze at what the furs failed to cover. </p><p>“No, no thank you. Good night… Zuko.”</p><p>She turned around and made her way back to her grandmother’s house. Zuko hesitantly shut the door and tried to respect her wishes of waiting to open the letter. But it still smelled faintly of her, a quality the ones he received in the mail didn’t possess, and he’d never been a patient man. </p><p>Opening it carefully so as to not ruin her handwriting addressing the letter (to just Zuko this time, not Fire Lord Zuko as they had previously read), he pulled the paper out. Skimming the characters and her words to the very bottom of the page covered in her looping signature, his eyes widened and he clapped a hand over his mouth.</p><p>It was like being struck by lightning for the second time in his life, a searing pain that flashed through him with incomprehensible heat. A heat that melted and welded and forced every broken little piece of his soul back into its place, smoothing over any cracks and blemishes. </p><p>Blindly scrambling for a thick parka and shrugging it onto himself, Zuko bounded out the door and into the freezing white of the night. It didn’t take him long to find her footprints and follow them, pulling the fur-lined hood over his head to shield him from the cold.</p><p>In the distance, her blue-clothed form grew until she was almost in his letter-gripping grasp. </p><p>“Katara!” he called out, watching her turn around with wide, surprised azure eyes that seemed to glow even in the darkness as he closed the space between them, unmarred by blood-smeared shards or footprints.</p><p>She inhaled sharply as they stood close enough that their noses almost touched and Zuko managed to rasp out, “I do, too.” </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>every day i try harder to meet the world limit and i get farther away from it. maybe if i stop trying i'll come in under.</p><p>anyways, this is probably my favorite work for this challenge so far. it was so fun to write! yes, the extended metaphor was a little heavy handed, but it was self indulgence, so oh well!</p><p>just like i predicted, the angst couldn't stay away for long. but this has a happy ending, so it doesn't really count. for pete's sake, a barely-clothed zuko runs out to katara in the snow (THEY'RE LITERALLY REENACTING MY FAVORITE SCENE FROM BRIDGET JONES'S DIARY)</p><p>stay tuned, there will be a part 2 for this story! (and thank you for reading!)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. unsent letters part 1: lonely together</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Day 6: Are You Lonely? of ZK Drabble December </p><p>(prequel to broken and mended pieces)</p><p>Zuko and Katara cope with inexorable loneliness by writing each other letters. They don't always send them.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Katara didn’t know why the urge to write Zuko overtook her so suddenly. </p><p>One moment, she was beside a campfire with only Appa for company, and the next she was fishing her parchment and ink from her bag. Nestling up against the furry sky bison, she sighed softly, figuring writing a letter would be a better use of her time than sitting and waiting for Aang to return. </p><p>At least this way, she wouldn’t be so alone. </p><p>She started to write.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Zuko,</em>
</p><p>
  <em> I know it’s been a while since we’ve been close. Or talked. But I haven’t been able to get you out of my head since the diplomatic summit in Yu Dao. No one else understands what it’s like to question your life decisions and the person you’ve become after the war. Suki, Sokka, Toph, Aang, and even you all carved out your own paths, but I just followed someone else's.  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> And it’s keeping me up at night, wondering what I could’ve done for myself if I hadn’t given up my own title to become the Avatar’s girlfriend. No one else gets it. Maybe I was imagining it, but you seemed to. Of all people, I think you would understand looking at yourself in a mirror and not recognizing the person you’ve become. Not that I have a mirror to look at myself in. I’m so lost in the haze that I can't see two feet in front of my own face. I don’t know what to do. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I miss you. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Katara</em>
</p><p> </p><p>She crumpled the letter up and threw it into the fire, watching the glowing embers fade from dusk to nighttime.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Dear Zuko, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> It’s been so long since we’ve seen each other. I’m currently camping outside of Makapu with Aang, whose spirit world antics brought us here. I miss having your firebending to light fires for cooking dinner like when we were kids. How are things in the Fire Nation? </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Sincerely, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Katara</em>
</p><p> </p><p>This one she sent.</p><p>***</p><p>Zuko couldn’t believe it when the letter came, battered and plain, but clearly addressed in Katara’s script. He read every word, savoring her voice in his head for as long as he could before eagerly writing his response.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Katara, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> It’s so good to hear from you after so long. We’d grown so far apart that I forgot how well we worked together, but Yu Dao reminded me. I’ve been missing you so much I’m homesick in my own home.  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Aang’s a firebender; I taught him myself. Why isn’t he lighting your fires? I wish I was there to do it for you. I’d light the whole forest on fire and make it go up like tinder if you asked me to.  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I wish we were kids again. I wish I wasn’t the Fire Lord and you weren’t the Avatar’s girlfriend and that we could exist without all the complications again. I wish we were just Katara and Zuko.  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Zuko</em>
</p><p> </p><p>He scrunched the parchment reply in his hands and watched his flames consume the sacrilegious words.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Dear Katara, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> You’re right; it has been a while. Anytime you need spark rocks, feel free to call me over. Makapu, the little fortuneteller’s town, right? I was there once, with my uncle, when I was still chasing you guys. I’d like to return someday, hopefully under better circumstances. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Things in the Fire Nation are as good as they can be. No assassination attempts this year, a good sign. I broke up with Mai, but it was a long time coming. So no hard feelings. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I’d love to hear more about your travels. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Best wishes, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Zuko</em>
</p><p> </p><p>The messenger hawk seemed to mock his failed attempt as it attended to the second letter.</p><p>***</p><p>Katara broke out in a smile that made her face ache when Zuko’s response arrived, the first of its kind in months. Aang questioned her about it, but she deflected. It wasn’t until she was alone again after darkness blanketed the sky that she opened it to respond.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Zuko, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I wish you’d been there in Makapu with me. I wish you were here in Kyoshi with me. I saw Suki and she’s so independent and accomplished it made me want to cry. But I didn’t want to upset anyone, so I waited until I was alone to do it.  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I’m glad your nation is finally coming around to how amazing you are and sorry about Mai. I admire your bravery for knowing when to call it quits before you got in too deep. I’m happy with Aang, really. But not all the time. Or very often. I’m alone a lot. Even when we’re together, I’m so lonely it hurts. It’s miserable.  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> We’re both alone now. It’s too bad we’re so far apart. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Katara</em>
</p><p> </p><p>The tiny ripped remains of her letter were buried in damp, fertile soil, never to be seen again.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Dear Zuko, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Makapu was great this time around, without you chasing us around! I’m just teasing, but please join Aang and me anytime you want. We’d love to have you around again. I’ll hold you to your spark rock promise. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I’m in Kyoshi now, so Suki and I are having a blast catching up. I think we’ll go to Avatar Kyoshi’s temple tomorrow if Aang is free.  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I’m happy things are stabilizing in the Fire Nation. My condolences regarding Mai, I know she was there for you during some turbulent times. Are you doing alright? </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Stay well, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Katara</em>
</p><p> </p><p>She didn’t know why she felt the need to sneak off to the post office the next day but settled on enjoying a personal connection that she didn’t have to share with Aang.</p><p>***</p><p>Zuko couldn’t fight the elation that rose in his chest upon receiving another letter from Katara or his haste in responding.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Ka-ta-ra,</em>
</p><p>
  <em> The syllables in your name seem strange when I don’t have an excuse to say them aloud. Sometimes I practice alone in the silence of my room to make sure I don’t forget how to greet you. I hope one day I’ll get to greet you again. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>The way you talk about the places you go and the people you meet is strange. It makes me wonder if you’re as miserable as I am. If I’m reading into your letters too much. Are you happy with Aang? Or are you lonely? Just like me? </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Why do we love people we can never be with? Why do the spirits play such cruel jokes on us? Why do they allow you to send letters and me to write back when it only makes it harder to breathe at night when even the sun has left me. When I’m completely and utterly solitary. Why? </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Zuko</em>
</p><p> </p><p>He almost set fire to his room trying to destroy such a damning work of literature.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Dear Katara, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Kyoshi, another place with a rich history for us. I hope you’re having a great time with Aang and Suki. I’d love to see you guys again, but I’m tied up right now as Fire Lord. As soon as I can, I’ll take you up on that offer. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Really, I’m fine after Mai. It was a relief. It feels nice to be alone again.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I'm invested in you adventures now. Where will you and Aang go next?</em>
</p><p>
  <em> Yours truly, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Zuko</em>
</p><p> </p><p>The emptiness replaced the giddiness as the messenger hawk flew away, leaving him alone again.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>still over the word limit. oh well. this may be a good time to mention i was that bitch in apush who wrote 8-page dbqs no one else wanted to peer review.</p><p>my fav thing about this fic was the progression of affection in their sign-offs.</p><p>i updated two things in one day and my brain is fried, but thank you to everyone for liking, commenting, or kudosing!</p><p>i had to split this up into two parts. the second one should be here on the 11th for the prompt: falling with you.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. unsent letters part 2: falling together and apart</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Day 11: Falling With You of ZK Drabble December</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Katara had started sleeping with the letters clutched to her chest like a child attached to a favorite toy. Just like when she was young, she kept her greatest source of comfort close to her heart.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Zuko, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I know this response is rather late, but Aang and I got caught up in some conflict around Yu Dao. We’re still here trying to resolve it, but, to be honest, I’d rather be anywhere else. In the Fire Nation with you. Back home in the South Pole with my dad and Gran Gran. I just want to be able to wake up in a bed knowing where I am. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> We were moving around so much during the war that I always looked forward to being able to put down roots afterward. Guess that was foolish considering I’m dating an Air Nomad. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> These politics are getting complicated here and we could really use your help. Not that any of us would admit that, due to you being so busy with so much on your plate. I could also use your help unrelated to politics. I wish I could talk to you. I’m so confused and no one will listen, but I know you would. If you were here. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Katara </em>
</p><p> </p><p>It had become a ritual: writing how she truly felt, filtering it down to make herself seem happy, and then destroying the evidence. </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Dear Zuko, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I know this is late, but I couldn’t find anywhere to send this until we just got to Yu Dao. I’m glad you’re enjoying my recounts of our adventures, even though I’m a rather dull storyteller.  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> The politics are crazy here, but I find it helps to stare everyone down with what I’ve named “the Zuko scowl”. I can see why you’re never smiling now; it’s very effective. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Aang and I ran into Toph the other day, who misses you a lot. She mentioned something about still wanting a ‘life-changing field trip” you and wished you would visit. I have a feeling you’re going to get a lot of love-punches the next time you see her. Maybe I’ll throw in a couple, too. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Take care, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Katara </em>
</p><p>***</p><p>Zuko had started spiraling in worry that she wouldn’t respond when the battered letter finally arrived, leading him to compose his response in a frantic haze in the middle of the night.</p><p>
  <em> Katara, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> You scared me so badly. I was worried something bad happened to you or I’d done something wrong and you now hated my guts. I know I shouldn’t be celebrating political unrest in Yu Dao, but it was an immense relief. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> It’s strange how randomly you appear in my thoughts at odd times throughout the day, especially when I’m expecting a letter. I could be in a council meeting and all of a sudden I have no idea what’s going on when my name is called because I was thinking about your eyes. Or I’ll stop dead in my tracks in the middle of firebending practice because I thought I heard you laugh. It’s the worst at nighttime when the possibility of what shadows can hold is endless. It’s easier to imagine you lurking nearby after dark, which makes it hurt all the more when I realize you’re an ocean away. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I’m rambling now and this letter will never see the light of day, so I’m going to end it. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Zuko </em>
</p><p> </p><p>The cinders of his blasphemy floated away in a swaying breeze as he began anew.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Dear Katara,  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> This must be how Uncle felt when I learned to make tea. I’m so proud you’ve finally mastered the art of the resting bitch face, my pupil. Use the power well. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Don’t even get me started on the Yu Dao conflict. I’m well aware of the situation, considering it’s been a constant pain in my ass lately. If you guys don’t fix it soo, I may have to come down there myself!  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> (That was meant to be a joke, not a threat. Tone is hard to convey in letters.) </em>
</p><p>
  <em> As for the life-changing field trip with Toph, I was hoping she would eventually forget about it and move on. That has not happened. We’ll see if I can placate her with ice cream the next time I see her. If not, I may have to plan another prison break. Maybe you can tag along this time. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Rightfully afraid of a 15-year old girl, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Zuko </em>
</p><p> </p><p>***</p><p>Katara practically dropped to her knees and praised the spirits when the letter finally came, grateful for relief from her boredom.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Zuko, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I’m falling apart and I don’t know what to do. We’re at the Southern Air Temple and there’s no one here and I feel so alone it hurts. Aang isn’t hearing a word I’m saying. It’s like you’re the only one who listens. Like I’m cut off these letters are the only connection I have with the outside world.  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Katara </em>
</p><p> </p><p>She sighed while ripping it to shreds.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Dear Zuko, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Thank Tui and La your letter came! Aang and I are at the Southern Air Temple now and there are literally two things to do: meditate or look at rocks.  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I’ve been looking at a lot of rocks. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Not much going on here to report about, but I’ve enclosed a sketch I did of a rock that kind of looks like a crane. I hope that makes up for it. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Eternally bored, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Katara </em>
</p><p>***</p><p>Zuko’s fingers went to work on their own accord as soon as he finished her letter, working on childish instinct as the carefully creased and folded the nearest paper he could find, an old budget report. (That was technically confidential, but he doubted Katara would leak it.)</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Katara,  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I feel really stupid for doing this, but I had to. I just couldn’t help myself. It’s all related to you, of course; somehow, you always manage to make me feel like a young, inexperienced idiot who knows nothing. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I hate myself for writing this and knowing I’ll never have the guts to send it. I hate myself for not having the strength to stop responding and move on with my life. I hate myself for finishing this letter and signing my name even though you’ll never see it. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Zuko </em>
</p><p> </p><p>He hung her sketch on his bedroom wall before starting the real one.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Dear Katara, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> You’re right; it does look like I crane. I see your sketch and raise you an origami crane. That way, if you’re ever bored anywhere else, you can remember that it can and has been worse. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I learned how to fold them when I was a kid. They’re supposed to be made with this really pretty colored paper, but I didn’t have any, so I used some old paperwork. I think you’d be good at it if you tried. Next time I see you, I’ll show you how. If you’d like. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Always yours,  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Zuko </em>
</p><p> </p><p>***</p><p>As she knelt on the riverbank, holding the soaking remains of her cherished paper crane and facing its destroyer, catharsis came. Katara couldn't bend the water out of her momento; it dissolved in her hands. Aang gave her an apologetic smile for his accidental soaking of everything she owned, but she hung her head with knowledge of what she was about to do.</p><p> </p><p>Days later, she sat in the cargo hold of a ship writing.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Zuko, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> It feels like a dream. I almost can’t believe I actually did it. I’m finally free.  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I don’t know how I’m going to face everyone. I feel so guilty I can’t sleep at night.  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Who am I now? Without the title of Avatar’s girlfriend? </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Why can’t I stop thinking about you?  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> I’m in love with you. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Katara stared in horror at the written admission, watching the ink bleed as tears dropped onto the paper. </p><p>“I’m in love with Zuko. When did I fall in love with Zuko?”</p><p>She'd once been suspicious he was harboring feelings for her, seemingly a lifetime ago. It was ironic, now. She loved him only after he'd moved on. Only when he didn't want her anymore.</p><p>“We fell in love with each other, just not at the same time,” she whispered into the oppressive darkness she sought to fade into.</p><p>Having wasted her paper with an admission she didn't want to face, Katara scrawled a short message onto the back of an old dumpling advertisement from the floor.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Dear Zuko, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Aang and I broke up. I’m going back home to the South Pole. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Please send any future letters there. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Thank you, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Katara </em>
</p><p>
  <em> P.S. I loved your crane, but I lost it. I’m sorry. </em>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>word count be damned!</p><p>pt. 3 was unexpected, but my long-winded ass had to break it up. this is where it's going to get good, so strap in tight.</p><p>thank you for reading, kudosing, and commenting!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. unsent letters part 3: walls collapsing around us</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Day 21: Tired of These Walls</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Zuko turned over the scuffled dumpling menu, failing at all attempts to read between the few lines present on the paper. He was concerned about Katara and wanted nothing more than to be there for her, to comfort her. </p><p>This wasn't possible, so he did the next best thing. Striding down in the streets of Caldera in the pouring rain, Zuko's surroundings didn't deter him in his singleminded haze. The probing looks and whispers that followed the five-pronged piece in his hair like a shadow were of no consequence as he entered the children's shop around a mostly-empty street corner.</p><p>Zuko couldn't bring himself to notice the shopkeeper's startled expression at his purchase or any of the events unfolding around him as he made his way back to the palace. The next time he found clarity was sitting at his desk, folding cranes out of brightly ornate crimson, yellow, and pale blue paper.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Katara, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I'd make you a thousand cranes before letting you feel guilty for losing one. But even a boatload of cranes couldn't assuage the guilt I feel. What kind of friend would be happy to hear that someone they love is in pain? Solely because it means my chance with you went from nonexistent to minuscule? I'm sorry that I'm selfish, but I want to be better. For you. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I wish I could run to the South Pole and hold you in my arms and stroke your hair and tell you everything is okay. I wish I could do that as a friend. I wish I didn't feel this way. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Zuko </em>
</p><p> </p><p>It was a ritual now and his hands reduced the paper to nothing by sheer force of habit.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Dear Katara,  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>I'm very sorry to hear about you and Aang parting ways. If you need anything, feel free to ask and I will send it to you as soon as I can. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Say hi to your brother and family in the South Pole for me. I wish you the very best. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> With deepest sympathies, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Zuko </em>
</p><p>***</p><p>Katara shuffled through the snow with a sense of urgency rearing its head for the first time since she'd returned home, all because her letter from Zuko was here. Eager to return home, Katara enjoyed the flush of cold on her cheeks and snug-fitting of her insulated parka that was just the way she remembered it as a child.</p><p>What had changed? Zuko.</p><p>Every attempt to dispel the feelings blossoming within her had failed, so Katara had moved on to acceptance and sneakily hiding her crush from her family.</p><p>Ripping open the envelope once safe in her room, Katara couldn't help but sag into her seat. The tiny, secret hope that he'd come running and sweep her off of her feet, the one she'd tucked away so neatly and deeply within her, was dead. The tears were an unfortunate accompaniment to this loss.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Zuko, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> It was stupid of me to wish you would come. I'm sorry; it's selfish. You're the Fire Lord and I'm a peasant from the Southern Water Tribe. I don't know what I was thinking. All I know is that I lie awake at night wishing you were here so badly it hurts.  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> The only time I'm happy is the few seconds after I wake up when I don't know where I am and can imagine you're beside me. I should be happy teaching waterbending to some kids here and being apart of my tribe again, but I can't help but think there are bigger things out there for me. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Katara </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Wiping away the warm tracks of salt off her face, Katara cried out as the paper cranes fell from the envelope.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Dear Zuko, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Thank you so much for the replacement cranes. They're gorgeous and the colors really brighten up my room here! </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Thank you for your kind wishes, but I assure you I am doing very well. The only thing I request is that you keep sending letters; it's nice to talk to you. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Sokka misses you a lot and wants his 'buddy' to visit, but Gran Gran doesn't remember who you are. (I think that may be for the best.) </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Yours,</em>
</p><p>
  <em> Katara </em>
</p><p> </p><p>***</p><p>Zuko smiled for what felt like the first time in eternity upon reading Katara's letter. </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Katara, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> It's amusing to me that you have no semblance of how much more I need these letters than you do. I will always write to you, whether or not you respond. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I wish that you wanted me to come running to you, not Sokka. But just the thought of you talking about me an entire ocean away fills me with enough peace to fall asleep at night. I miss you so much it hurts. I run through scenarios in my head constantly about how differently things could be if you loved me back. But it's wrong of me and I'm sorry. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Zuko </em>
</p><p> </p><p>He buried his face in his hands before Zuko composed himself and replaced his facade.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Dear Katara, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I'm glad you enjoyed the cranes! I agree that it may be best to not bring up my past behavior around your grandmother, but I have good news for Sokka. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I will be visiting the South Pole on a diplomatic trip very shortly and look forward to seeing you guys again. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> As for the letters, I'm happy to keep sending them as long as you like. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Yours forever, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Zuko </em>
</p><p>*** </p><p>Katara didn't get the letter until the envoy was nearing her home and was caught entirely off-guard. What would it be like to face Zuko with the knowledge of how she truly felt? How was Katara supposed to have a conversation with him and not drop to her knees sobbing about destiny simultaneously? </p><p>There was no answer. So she did the next best thing: avoided him. Donning a cloak and retreating to the shadows, Katara watched the man she loved walk past her, unseeing. His regal posture and stony face matched the unbendable metal of his crown, and it struck Katara just how unlike himself he had become. It took every ounce of strength she had to not weep for a love lost.</p><p>All of the warmth and love Sokka could muster for him, Katara did not share. Hers was so much greater that it could not be shown. </p><p>They both kept their distance with the exception of small looks and smiles across a room full of people.</p><p>Katara kept this up for as long as she could before finally shattering on his last night in the Southern Water Tribe. If she kept this tucked away neatly any longer, there would be nothing left of herself to hide it with.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Zuko, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I'm tired of these walls of ice and snow I've built up around myself trying to protect my heart. I'm freezing and melting and in agony every day I wake up and pretend to not love you. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> It's strange to finally admit, but I love you. I have for a long time and I don't know when or how it started, but I lie awake at night, unable to sleep because it threatens to consume me. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Every time I look at one of those beautiful paper cranes you made me, it hurts. That's how much I love you. I'm lonely even surrounded by people I love because they're not you and never can be. You are one-of-a-kind and wonderful and brilliant and selfless and kind, which makes it so much harder to let go. But it's what's best for both of us, in the long run. That's why I'm writing this. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I'm sorry that our friendship will never be the same after you read this. I don't want to lose you, but loving you from afar is tearing me apart. Please forgive me, but I can't be friends with you and love you without losing myself. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I love you and I'm so sorry. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Katara </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Before she could lose her nerve and draft a more palatable second draft as she had done previously, Katara shrugged on a parka and snuck out. Every inch of snow trudged through brought her closer to Zuko, so she didn't feel the cold seeping into her bones.</p><p>Katara stood outside his door for a long time before gathering the courage to knock. Any semblance of her bravery was dispelled by his shirtless form and sleep-heavy eyes.</p><p>She mumbled some nonsense about waiting to open it before retreating back on the verge of tears.</p><p>It felt as if Katara's chest was being torn apart by jagged, broken glass with every step she took farther from him, but she still moved forward.</p><p><em> This is for the best; it'll help you move on </em>, she assured herself as the dam holding back waves of grief threatened to spill within her.</p><p>When the last shards of hope grew heavy and Katara began to let them go, she heard her name being called behind her and gasped.</p><p>The sight of Zuko, barely clothed and sprinting recklessly through the snow was enough to make her light-headed. His declaration of, "I do, too," brought an unprecedented smile to her tear-stained face, which he wiped with bare hands. </p><p>Katara blinked, unable to believe the content of her most ridiculous fantasies unfolding in front of her. "W-what? Zuko-"</p><p>"Don't be sorry. I love you, Katara. More than you could ever imagine," he whispered, finally closing the little space left between them as he enveloped her in his arms and lips, a raging inferno in the heartland of swirling snow.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>i literally posted this one minute before 12 am. and that's on procrastination. but i'm finally finished with these series and that's a wrap on letters unsent, burdens unshared. it was definitely one of the most fun things i've written this month.</p><p>i've gotten overly invested in completing every day of the prompt on time (despite the fact i don't work ahead and do everything the day of), but i think i'm actually going to make it. (not jinxing it by mentioning it, of course). we'll see if it actually happens, but i'm super proud of making it this far. and the whole 'finally finishing a work in progress for the first time in months' is also a plus.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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